Why are handjobs necessary in class?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize