If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
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