One girl and one boy is just not enough.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
