We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize