i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize