How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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