I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
