Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
