Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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