so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
babies were throwing up all over the place
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
