Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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