We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
