? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
