Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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