But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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