So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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