Just mADE A PArabola og urine
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
