ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize
