Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
