yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
