It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
