I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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