i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
you never un-have a 4some
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
