i wish peter jackson would direct porn
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
