good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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