Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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