I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
