I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
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