I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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