How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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