Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Come share oat with me in your robe
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
He's on the porch naked. Help.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
