he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
