the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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