Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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