It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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