I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
As shirtless as possible
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
