Dual....:-)
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Randomize
