The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
