just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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