Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
