even my farts smell like vagina
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
They took my balls.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
