The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize
