She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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