Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
