Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
