i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
