My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
