How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
