I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
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