A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Randomize
