Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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